Where It Began
A few months ago, I decided to turn my lifelong passion of lifestyle photography into an actual side gig (because having two young kids under 3 and a Full-Time job clearly isn't enough)! I'm joking.. but I'm also dead serious. It wasn't enough, emotionally speaking that is. After nearly a decade of being in the service industry, and resisting the 9-5 schedule, I finally succumbed to it, and guess what, I loved the stability it brought me. But I also didn't feel fulfilled. All the while, I was attending photography school, creating emotionally-dense projects, getting my work out there, and also not feeling fulfilled (and mentally drained on top of that). Something wasn't working, so I walked away from photography thinking that was the issue.
What Happened?
Those years in photography school and creating projects that were ultimately about my past and family (whose family isn't a little complicated) were emotionally and mentally draining, in both a good and bad way. Good, because of what I learned about myself, the risks I took, and the skills that I refined. Bad, because it opened old wounds within myself and my family that I hadn't been brave enough to face in the past.
![](http://images-pw.pixieset.com/elementfield/276371912/8c8c61d371a1b0dee5ce1f0b90b7d3be-49e12028.jpg)
![](http://images-pw.pixieset.com/elementfield/976371912/2dc2049b137bda3353bae4c52cc17350-0446591d.jpg)
![](http://images-pw.pixieset.com/elementfield/686371912/4ee95a684f6f78348b10d496a55afa50-bfd8be8b.jpg)
Getting Personal
In talking to a close friend, I realized something: maybe I'm not meant to only have a 9-5 or only be an emotionally-exhausted artist. I love photography, and lifestyle photography at that. I value moments that are real and vulnerable: the way the light enters a home while the kiddos are still asleep, the energetic screams at a birthday party, the way a newborn nuzzles into their loved one's chest while the toddler runs circles around the kitchen island. Photography is my way of communicating that connection to the world.
![](http://images-pw.pixieset.com/elementfield/587672912/f11d2a0f36131480a5d74209b28c155f-81b130ba.jpg)
So, What Now?
Do I regret walking away from photography for a little while? Absolutely not, but I also didn't realize how much I'd miss it. The time away allowed me to realize that perhaps I wasn't photographing in a way that felt true to me. So now, in-between naps, and after the kiddos have gone to sleep at night, I work on what I love. I've been obsessed with photography for a long time: I went to school for it, taught it, practiced it. And then I walked away from it. Being back behind the camera now, though, feels different somehow, and I'm excited (and terrified) to see where it takes me.